My Refuge from the Storm

I have a new post in the process of being written about what's been going on in my life (it's been hectic) but I thought I would take a moment to write what is in my heart right now.
I just read the post A Quiet Refuge by Ashleigh from Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. It is a really good post about where she runs in a troubled time of her life. Her places are generally far away from her home, they are places that are calming to her. I also have quiet places, they are places that I've found, not far from where I am, that are quiet, calm, and comforting to me. It is in those places that I find sweet relief from the rat race of life, the troubles in life, and where I find God is the closest to me, or rather, I am the closest to God.
When I am at home and life gets hard, and my heart is heavy, I run to the creek that borders our property. There is a certain place that I climb down the creek bank and "hide" from the world. Unless you are looking VERY closely it is impossible to see me. It is there that I can cry and pray and often I ask God, "Why?" But it is often there that I find sweet peace and comfort, and there that I feel God's arms around me as He holds me tenderly and lets me know that He cares for me.
At college it is EXTREMELY difficult to find a quiet place of refuge. However, if you look long enough and hard enough those places, although few and far between can be found. I have found that early in the morning, before most people are awake it is wonderful to walk outside, to one of the benches and there is a wonderful, quiet place to be alone with God. Right now with Spring here, and the flowers in bloom, the birds chirping, as the sun comes over the horizon, God seems to be almost tangible. He comes everyday to meet me, and I love spending time with Him.
Sometimes the cares and fears of the world hit me during the day, when this occurs, which is quite often, it is much harder to find a quiet place where nobody is around and I can cry out to God and let my thoughts and feelings come out in a jumbled mess that even I cannot put together or make any sense out of, but God can. Yet it seems that when those times come, God opens a door somewhere for me, and I find the quiet that I need. How good He is!
Some of you know the problems that I have had this school year, and in particular this semester. Not only the physical problems following my surgery in January, but also the other inside hurts that I have experienced. The ONLY way that I have managed to get through them is because of the quiet places that I have found. The times I got alone with God, and poured out my heart to the One who knows all, and knows and understands my thoughts better than I understand them. He feels my pain, and sees my tears, and ever so gently He dries my tears, and lets me know that He is right beside me, holding my hand and guiding me through my hardships.
I have been through a lot this semester, but looking back I see that God was with me the whole way, and though I still don't understand much of what has happened, or why it has happened, this I do know: God put it there for a reason, and it has helped me to mature Spiritually, and I have drawn closer to Him than ever before, thanks to those quiet places where God meets with me.
The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. Deuteronomy 33:27

I love to steal awhile away
From every cumbering care,
And spend the hours of closing day
In humble, grateful, prayer.

I love in solitude to shed
The penitential tear,
And all His promises to plead
Where none but God can hear.

I love to think on mercies past,
And future good implore,
And all my cares and sorrows cast
On God, whom I adore.

I love by faith to take a view
Of brighter scenes in heaven;
The prospect doth my strength renew,
While here by tempests driven.

Thus, when life’s toilsome day is o’er,
May its departing ray,
Be calm at this impressive hour,
And lead to endless day.

~Phoebe Brown

Wonderful Wednesday!

My day started bright and early with a phone call at 5:01 this morning!! It was Doug. I had jokingly told him last night that he could call me at 5 when I woke up, I wasn't expecting him to actually take me up on the offer! LOL!! I was looking for a picture of him, and the only one that I could find that was recent of Doug was from my graduation (actually, mom found it and emailed it to me).

*****Doug is the guy second in from the left*****

Classes went well. I got a 92% on my World History test that I took Monday. It was the 3rd highest grade (out of 4), the other 3 got 94%, 93% and 89%, so we were all pretty close. I have a test in English Grammar on Friday, oh joy! :( I took a quiz in New Testament Survey. I think it went pretty well. :) Choir seemed to drag today, I'm not really sure why it seemed that way, but oh well. We even got out 5 minutes early, but it just seemed like it didn't want to end for some reason.
Chapel was once again really good. Pastor Bailey spoke on Praying for Revival, but not just revival in general, but praying for personal revival. It was really, really good!
I had voice lessons. They went well. I hit a B!! I was pretty amazed! :) I got 2 new songs, but I don't remember what they are, I will get the music probably tonight so I will post later with the titles. :) I do know that I know one of them, and had never heard the other one before today. I like them both though.
The tulip that I took pictures of yesterday was fully opened today, so I took more pictures today, it was BEAUTIFUL!! I took pictures of other plants and stuff too! It was a BEAUTIFUL day!!

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*****A new tulip will bloom soon! YAY!*****

*****I thought the moth was beautiful on the flower****

*****While I was taking pics of flowers some of the guys were painting the building and being goofy, so I took their pic!! :) *****

*****The Christian school took advantage of the warm weather to play ball*****

It's Spring!!

Last night in dorm devotions Mrs. Mushtaq spoke to us. For an illustration she handed several of us styrofoam cups and then came down the line pouring what looked like water from a cup into what looked like a small wooden goblet, and pouring from that into our cups. After we all had some in our cups she told us to drink it and then tell her what we thought. We all kinda looked at each other nervously and tried a sip, it had a really funny taste. Bitter was the best word to describe the flavor. It was regular water in the styrofoam cup, but it was poured into wormwood, which gave it the funny flavor. Apparently the longer the water is in the wormwood the worse it tastes, we were all glad that Mrs. Mushtaq had only had the water in the wormwood for at the VERY most a minute before we got it in our cups. However, it was a REALLY good illustration of sin, and how quickly it becomes bitter.
I love Tuesdays and Thursdays because I only have 3 classes, and they are all relatively easy, especially compared to my Monday, Wednesday, and Friday classes. First period was Christian Home, we got our test results back, I got a 95%, not bad, although it ruins my 100% average in the class, but oh well, I think I can still handle that. :)
I had a wonderful free period in which I made some phone calls following up on job applications. One of the places said they weren't hiring, another said that for some reason the online application that I had filled out said that I wasn't eligible for the job. She asked me a couple of questions and said that shouldn't have happened, so i had to fill out that application....again. The other store that I called said that I needed to talk to the manager, and he wasn't in today, so I have to call tomorrow. So far, not so good. :( Please continue to pray that I find a job.
Chapel was really good. Pastor Wes Bailey from North Carolina is here for a couple of days. He is the dad of 2 of the students here. He preached from Psalm 56, using the whole chapter, but his text was verse 9, "When I cry unto thee, then shall mine enemies turn back: this I know; for God is for me." The title of the message was, "This I know, for God is for me." It was REALLY good! He is going to be preaching tomorrow as well, and I'm looking forward to the sermon.
My next class was Christian Womanhood. We learned more about interior decorating, finished up that topic and then went on to verse 23 of Proverbs 31 and discussed the success of a husband, and how it is the wife that makes or breaks her husband. It really is a VERY scary thing to think about. Obviously I'm not married, nor do I have a boyfriend, but hopefully some day in the future I will have one, and I want him to succeed at whatever God has called him to do. It is a good reminder to stay close to God ALWAYS!!
Let's not even go into what I learned in Intro to Missions, or rather what I didn't learn in that class. I didn't learn anything, like normal. I spent the hour IMing and texting friends, and filling out job applications online.
I actually ate lunch in the cafeteria today! They had baked chicken, so I could eat it!! It was WONDERFUL!! :)
Nothing exciting happened at work. I worked about 15 extra minutes in order to finish something up, but that was ok since I had left early yesterday.
After work I came back to my room and worked for several hours on the World History that I'm teaching. It's really hard to fit all of WWI into one 50 minute lesson! It's a LOT of info to condense down to such a small time frame.
I found one brave tulip that flowered today, so I took some pics, it is really pretty, and since tulips are my favorite flower I HAD to take some pictures!!

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*****Flowers on a bush*****

*****It's all green and alive! It's Spring time!!*****

A Special Letter in Memory of David DeKruyter

This is an email that was sent out by the brother of my friend who died on Easter. I thought it was really good and special. It probably won't mean as much to you as it meant to me, but I hope you can see the life that "Duncle Ave" had and the wonderful blessing that he was to me and to others around him.

Dear Family, Friends, and Loved Ones:

I am writing this late Sunday (Easter) night to share the news with you regarding the home-going of my brother, Dave. Some of you may know Dave’s early history; most of you probably do not. David was born three months prematurely on August 29, 1953, causing damage to the retinas of his eyes, resulting in the loss of all sight in the left eye and more than 95% in the right eye. Dave went to a private school in Chicago for two years, and then transferred to the Indiana School for the Blind, where he finished elementary and high school. At age 14 his mother died, and four years later his father and one older sister passed away. From that time, Dave and I lived together for brief periods, and near each other in the Bloomington and Indianapolis areas. When I moved to Hammond, Dave followed. When I pastored in Goshen, Dave became the pianist and organist for our church. After I left Goshen, a Pastor friend of ours in Pekin, Illinois, offered Dave an opportunity to come and be the pianist and organist of Bethel Baptist Church. Dave has been in Pekin, for five years living by himself in a nice high-rise apartment building.

He had been having some health issues, recently, and during a physical a week ago Monday, it was discovered that Dave had cancer of the colon, liver, and lungs. It was not suspicioned that he had this serious a problem, because he could not see the symptoms that a normally sighted person would have seen. He had surgery this past week, in Peoria, Illinois, to remove a section of his bowel and reconnect it, which seemed a success. He was recovering from his surgery, and plans were being made for him to be transferred to a nursing facility in the Indianapolis area upon his release this coming Wednesday, at the earliest. He had expressed his wishes to be close to the family in the remaining days. We were not expecting Dave to improve, and figured he might have only several months, if that long.

My sister, Ann, had been here this past week; staying with Dave, and shuttling back and forth between the hospital and his apartment. Yesterday, Doug and I arrived in Peoria and had a good visit with Dave, Ann, and his pastor. We were hoping to minister to Dave and reassure him. This week had been full of change for him, and he was struggling to adapt. We left about 11pm and went back to the apartment to sleep. At 4:30am he called and asked me to come to the hospital. I told him we would be there in a couple hours, and prayed with him on the phone. Approximately an hour later, Dave called me and said, “John, I don’t know if you remember it, or not; but, Debi went home to heaven on the Lord’s Day.” He meant Sunday, and was not particularly referring to the fact that it was Easter.

I said, “Yes, Dave, I remember that.”

He said, “I want to do that, too.”

I paused for a minute, trying to understand what, exactly, he was saying. I finally said, “Dave, what do you mean……………………………Today?”

He said, “Yes………………will you pray and ask Him if he will take me home today?”

I prayed and relayed his request to his Heavenly Father, asking God to spare Dave further pain and suffering and grant Dave’s request if it were pleasing to Him and in His perfect plan, and would glorify Him.

Dave thanked me and said he wanted to see us soon. I told him we would be there as soon as possible.

Ann had arrived at the hospital before Doug and I got there. When we arrived, his breathing was becoming increasingly labored. We talked to him, but his voice was weak and he seemed so tired, closing his eyes often and his responses getting softer. We began to realize that God was answering his prayer. I called several of Dave’s lifelong friends, and was able to put them on speakerphone and hold it to his ear. With difficulty, they said their goodbyes. Dave’s breathing was slow, but steady; but he was not able to say anything now. The nurses came in and wanted to wash Dave up and change his bed. We excused ourselves and at the nurses’ suggestion went to the cafeteria for a quick bite to eat. At 12:58pm we came to the door of Dave’s room. The nurse said to come in quickly; that his vital signs were fading fast. I looked at Dave and his eyes were wide open, looking up, as if startled from sleep. I said, “He looks so alert.” As we walked around the bed to his side, I looked up at the monitors. At that moment they all flat-lined, and then the alarm sounded. I looked down at Dave and realized what he must have been seeing. It was 1:00pm on the Lord’s Day. Just as Dave had requested.

Dave no longer uses a blind person’s cane, or strong flashlights to read, or magnifiers to see. The operation that he so often prayed for, is complete. Now, he sees better than you and I see. Now, he sees the face of his dear Savior. Now he knows, even as he is known. Dave knew that he would be preceding us by only a little while. By only a moment, really. He knew that the dead in Christ would rise first, and then we which are alive and remain would be taken up. Don’t weep for Dave. We weep for ourselves and the loss we feel. If you are saved, your entry into Glory will be just as glorious as Dave’s. That’s what Dave would want. And that’s what the Savior wanted when He went to the Cross two thousand years ago and shed His blood for your sins. You are not your own, you are bought with a price. If you are honest, you will give Jesus what he paid for. YOU!

Dave’s Graduation Service will be at Bethel Baptist Church in Pekin, IL, this coming Saturday at 1pm Pekin time, (2pm Indiana time) with visitation two hours prior to the service. Other necessary details will be sent out as soon as available.

And, finally, we rejoice in the Lord, for His faithfulness, and the opportunity to grow in compassion through tribulation; that we may be able to minister to others, as is stated in 2 Cor. 1.

3 ¶ Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort;

4 Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

Thank you all for your love and involvement in David’s life and ours.

For my brother,

John DeKruyter

Easter Sunday and Easter Monday

I had a really good Easter Sunday. I didn't ride on the bus because the choir did a special concert Sunday morning and so everybody was required to be there, and we had an early choir practice at 8:15 that was also required. We sang 3 songs, "Up From the Grave," "It is Finished," and "Alive!" I liked all of them, but Alive! was my favorite. There were a lot of kids that rode the bus yesterday! I was really surprised! It was REALLY good. I don't think I mentioned this before, but on Friday the church had a teen activity and one of the guys on my bus route got saved!! That was sooooo cool!!
I was able to have Easter dinner with the Phillips' and the McMahon's. It was a lot of fun and good food!! :-P
Mrs. Phillips, Bro. Mike, and I had to be back at church by 5 for choir practice. I checked my phone and found out that a friend of mine had died about 2 o'clock yesterday afternoon!! He had been diagnosed with colon cancer 2 weeks ago, and apparently it was worse than I had thought. Please pray for the DeKruyter family as they are dealing with this sudden loss of a brother and uncle. I called him Uncle Dave, or Duncle Ave, and I know that I will miss him and his sweet spirit and the hours of music that we used to play together when he lived closer to us. His funeral will be Saturday in Illinois, where he lived. My family will be going. I think mom is going to be doing the music for the funeral cuz Uncle Dave was the pianist for his church. I know he has left a HUGE gap in his family, church, and friends lives. We will miss him! But he got to go home on Sunday, as he so wished to do, and not just any Sunday, but Easter Sunday.
It's a good thing that Mrs. Phillips was in the jeep with me cuz she gave me a hug, and I needed it REALLY REALLY bad!!
After that everything is pretty much a fog. I know I was at choir practice and church and I worked, but I don't remember any particular details.
After work I came back to my room to study for a World History test. That was fun....NOT! I was up pretty late. UGH!
Today dawned WAY to bright and early, well it wasn't exactly bright, just early, 5 am! YUCK again. I hate late nights and early mornings, they happen all the time. I guess that is just part of college life, but I still don't like it at all!
I think the World History test went ok. I had to use the process of elimination quite a bit. Oh well, at least Mrs. Donaghue brought chocolate to class with her, so that did help. :) Other than that classes went fine.
I got to sleep for almost 30 minutes between classes and work which was LOVELY!! Between the nap and a big mug of coffee I was able to make it through work just fine. :) There was no Christian school today because it is Easter Monday, I just think that they didn't want to have class, cuz the college still had classes. Since there was no mess to clean up in the school I was able to finish work early! I even did some extra things that I don't normally do and still was done 25 minutes early!! :) :) That made me VERY happy!
I just have some minor studying to do tonight and then I am going to work on the World History lesson that I am teaching on Friday....I think that will be fun! :)

Resurrection!

As I think about Easter and what it really is, the celebration of my Savior's resurrection, my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude to Jesus for all that He has done for me. He took my sin on Himself and for me He died so that I might live eternally with Him. I think of the pain of betrayal, I know how I feel when a friend has betrayed me, yet Jesus had the ultimate betrayal. His suffering through illegal trials, being falsely accused and yet did not defend Himself. The beatings, the mocking, the long walk up to Golgotha, the nails being driven one by one into His hands and feet. As He hangs on the cross Jesus endured more mocking and utter rejection by the very people for whom He is dying, yet He pleads with His Father to forgive His scorners. The sky grew dark and there was a great earthquake, as Jesus, the Lamb of God, the perfect sacrifice, takes on all the sin of the world, past, present, and future. He took on my sin and yours. After three long hours He said, "It is finished," and died. Not believing that He was dead, a soldier stabs Jesus in the side and out of it flowed water, a wonderful symbol of living water, water that you and I may drink of and live eternally. They took His body from the cross and buried it in a sepulchre, sealed His tomb, and placed guards around it to keep His body from being stolen. For three long days and nights Jesus' body lay in that tomb. But on Sunday morning Christ arose! He now lives so that you and I may live forever!

Why Should He Love Me So?

Love sent my savior to die in my stead;
Why should He love me so?
Meekly to Calvary's cross He was led;
Why should He love me so?

Nails pierced His hands and His feet for my sin;
Why should He love me so?
He suffered sore my salvation to win;
Why should He love me so?

O how He agonized there in my place;
Why should He love me so?
Nothing withholding my sin to efface;
Why should He love me so?

Why should He love me so?
Why should He love me so?
Why should my Savior to Calvary go?
Why should He love me so?

-Crystal Lewis

100th post!

This post is the 100th post that I've ever written!! I can't believe that I've written so much or that it has been so long since I started this blog!
I got 9 1/2 hours of sleep last night! It was kinda by accident that I got that much though. I went to sleep around 10:30 and was planning on getting up at 7:30 like I usually do on Saturdays. Well, I heard my first two alarms go off at 7:20 and 7:25, but apparently I slept through my 7:30 alarm! OOPS!! I didn't wake up until 8.
Bus route was interesting. It was raining and whenever that happens we usually drive the route. Well, I was dying to be outside, so I asked Margaret if she minded walking the route. She said that was fine with her, we both wanted the exercise. So we were dropped off at one end of the route. It was pouring rain! Neither one of us is sure if it was such a great idea that we wanted to walk. We both got thoroughly drenched and looked like drowned rats! LOL! It was nice to walk though. :) We both froze! When we got back to the dorms I took a REALLY hot shower!
This afternoon daddy called me and said that he found a possible car for me. :) It is a 1984 Oldsmobile Cutlass, with only 45,000 miles on it! He said that it looks like it has hardly been driven at all! The only problem is that they want $2,700 for it! There is no way that I can afford that. However the guy is interested in an alarm system, so he might be willing to do a little bit of trading for the car. I'm praying that if this is what God wants that it will work out.
I have lots of homework to do. Both of my English classes have quite a bit due for Monday. There is homework for World History, plus a test, plus I am teaching in it on Friday, so I'm working on my lesson for that. I also have chapter themes due for New Testament Survey, so I have plenty to do today. I can't wait until school is done. Only a few more weeks! YAY!! :)
As you can see, I already changed my background. I liked the flip flops, but it was a little too busy for me, and after only a few days, I couldn't take it anymore!!! I decided to go with something MUCH simpler!! I think it is much easier on the eyes, or at least my eyes!! LOL