Friday, October 29, 2010

Choices...

Have you ever really struggled with God over something? Maybe it's a big decision, or a life changing event, possibly it's something you can't control, or perhaps you can control and what you want isn't what God wants. Often this type of situation requires a lot of prayer and tears.

I have recently had a situation like this arise in my life. I've been planning for the past two years to finish my four year degree in 3 1/2 years. I've worked very hard and had insane class schedules in order to get all the credits and classes I needed. Just recently I had a long chat with the Academic Dean. We did a lot of number crunching and discovered that I'm three credits short of that goal and I have no possible way of cramming those credits into an already packed schedule. Talk about a let down. It felt like I'd done all that work for nothing.

Having come to this point I realized that I now had two choices and either way I was still going to be here for the extra semester. My first option was to throw a little fit and complain, groan and moan about the whole thing. The second choice was to suck it up, realize that God had a purpose in the whole thing and be happy about it. I'm not going to lie, it was a really hard thing for me (still is, actually) and I have shed many tears over it. However, as is often the case in my life, I've found that although I may not see it now, I know that God has a purpose and a plan for all of this. I have to trust that He knows what is best for my life, and His plans are way above my highest imagination and wildest dreams. I have had to lay what *I* wanted at His feet and trust Him for each little and big step I take.

"From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him. Then said Jesus, unto the twelve, 'Will ye also go away?' Then Simon Peter answered him, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life. And we believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God.'" (John 6:66-69)

The greatest desire of my heart is to honor and glorify my Heavenly Father in everything that I do. When the end of my life comes I sincerely want to be able to look back on all that I have done and say, "That was all because of God!"

2 comments:

Jason A. Hunsicker said...

Wow...I know how much you really wanted to get done in 3 and a half years. I'm sure that was VERY hard to accept. I'm glad God is giving you the grace to accept it.

AlynCarolina said...

Praise the Lord for people like you Hannah! Keep on Keeping on and I KNOW God will reward you for it!!