A Legacy

Friday was the funeral for my 22 year old cousin, Zac. God chose to take him suddenly from this earth to his eternal home in heaven. No one had a chance to say good-bye, he was given no chance to make anything right, God just took him. Yet for one so young, Zac left behind a legacy that screamed of glorifying and loving God. He walked with God and he lived his life with a seriousness that is astounding. God was the center of his life. He lived and died for His glory. Everything everyone said about Zac showed his deep love for God and the people around him. The lives he touched, the people he influenced, the difference he made, all of it is amazing.

For the past week as we dealt with the shock, grief, funeral, all of it, my thoughts keeps running to the fact that Zac was only just over a year older than me. I can't tell you how much I have wept, not at the thought of his death, but at the thought of how imminent my death could be. It's so easy to think, "Eh, I'm only 21, nothing is going to happen, I have my entire life in front of me." But that is so not true. Only God knows the length of my days. It's easy to take life for granted...to assume that I'm going to live until I'm 90, it's easy to blow each day focused on the things of this world and not taking much time to focus on God and the real meaning of life -- glorifying Him. I am ashamed at how much time I spend doing what I want rather than doing what God wants me to do.

I can't get over how fast a life can be snuffed out. It a matter of mere seconds someone can go from alive and perfectly well right into eternity. (I know this is nothing new, just a new reality for me.) Life really is just a vapor, here and then gone. Sometimes that vapor lasts slightly longer than others, but still, it goes by quickly and just as quickly it disappears. What is more important, doing what I want or doing something that matters for God? Which matters more, fame and fortune or the lives of others? God calls each Christian to make an influence on the lost around us, to bring them to Him.

If I were to die tomorrow what would people say at my funeral? What would be my legacy? Would they talk about how much I loved God and wanted to serve Him? Or would they talk about what I had wanted to do? Would they say my life glorified God or would they say it glorified me?

Thankful for...

I had a long thanksgiving post mostly written and was going to finish it tonight, but I deleted it. This year I can say I am most thankful for pain and heartache. Yeah, I know, that's not "normal" but it's true. The pain, heartache, loss, struggles, decisions, tears, sleepless nights, all of it, I am thankful. Why? Because through it all I learned that God truly gives a song in the night. He gives peace, love, guidance, direction, mercy, grace, strength, healing, comfort, protection, and on the list could go. He is almighty, unchangeable, God. In His loving plan He brought the hard times to my life to grow, stretch and strengthen me. His blessings do often "come through raindrops."

He Knows the Way I Take

"But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold."

~~*Job 23:10*~~

When I read this I was overwhelmed by God. He not only knows the next step that I am going to take, He knows my whole path. He knows each hill and each valley; each twist and each turn. Each pothole and each bump. He knows each potential hazard that can trip me up and each flower along the wayside to brighten my journey. He knows it all because His loving hand created it uniquely for me.

Sit back for a second and reminisce on how crazy your life has been in the past year, five years, decade, or even your whole life. Think about all the times you didn't think you could carry on one more minute. The times that life seemed so bleak and dismal that you thought for sure the clouds would never pass and the sun was no longer in existence. Amazingly, you did make it through, the sun did shine again, and your path once again became flat and much easier. So often I find myself in the depths of despair, wondering if my path will ever again gain the same altitude that it once had. I feel lost in despair and cry out, "GOD WHERE ARE YOU?!" How foolish of me. God is there. He created this specific detour in my path so that I would learn to trust His guidance once again. He did it so that I would, "come forth as gold."

God loves each one of us, and He will never give us more than we can handle. Yes, He pushes us, and yes, He stretches us, but He never destroys us. If we break because of pressure it is our own doing, not His. When our loving Father created the trials of our lives, He created them so we could learn to trust His leading, trust His path, trust His trials, and yes, trust His blessings. He longs for each of us to take Him at His Word and realize that He knows our path better than we do because He created it for us.

On the Moon and God's Timing

Last night I went to a truck pull with a good friend of mine. Being girls, we didn't just sit and watch the trucks (although we did a lot of that), we also talked quite a bit --we always do when we're together. We discussed life and how difficult it is to see the big picture. We both know that God is in control, and we are both happy waiting on Him, yet sometimes that wait is so hard to bear. We know if we trust God and delight in Him, He will give us the desires of our hearts, yet still, our hearts long for certain things for which God has not yet given the "ok."

Towards the end of the night I looked up at the moon. It was a beautiful, bright harvest moon, although not full. (After I got home I looked it up and it is a waning gibbous.) The moon is not always beautiful and bright, sometimes it's hidden by clouds. Other times it's not as full as we would like it to be, but eventually that phase comes and it is something amazing to behold. A new moon doesn't even appear to be in existence, but still it is, we just have to wait. No matter what, the sun is still behind the moon and it is shining, even in the moon's darkest hours.

Life is so much like the moon. We go through phases of fullness and completeness, only to be hit by a phase of slow waning and then darkness. At times it seems like things should be going well, but the clouds of doubt and despair move in and cover our joy. Yet through it all God's Son is shining behind and through us, longing for us to allow Him to make us into something more beautiful than we could ever imagine. He always sees us as a full moon, because He knows the path that we are going to be taking. We simply have to trust Him. Every one of us has the potential to reach the full moon phase when Jesus is shining through us.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever...to him who made the great lights...the moon and stars to rule over the night, for his steadfast love endures forever." {Psalm 136:1,7a,9}

Keep a Watch

“Set a watch, O Jehovah, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips. Incline not my heart to any evil thing, to practice deeds of wickedness with men that work iniquity; and let me not eat of their dainties.”

~Psalms 141:3-4 (ASV)

My current job is working full-time at a dry cleaner as the customer service attendant. I enjoy working with the customers and meeting all sorts of people. For the most part I also enjoy working with my co-workers. Only, there are a few problems, the biggest is that they all have a very “French” vocabulary, if you know what I mean. They are constantly using cuss words even in their regular conversations, not to mention when they get angry which is quite often. It is very difficult in that environment to keep that language from slipping into my thoughts and worse, my own speaking. I find myself getting angry and words pop into my mind that I know shouldn’t be there, thankfully they’ve only slipped out once, and even then I was horrified.

I was trying and trying to come up with a verse or something that would help me to get rid of the thoughts swirling in my mind. The anger, the frustration, the words, the disgracing of my dear Savior’s name, I was tired of it. I was praying but that didn’t seem to be helping much, I needed a reminder. Then, out of the blue Psalm 141:3 popped into my head. Thankful for a bit of relief I quickly found the passage and read the whole Psalm, discovering that the entire chapter was exactly what I needed for my situation. Verse four seemed to fit so well, and I have decided to put that to memory as well. Keep a watch dear Father, keep a watch is now my constant prayer.

I know I am not the first, nor am I the only person to work with people like that, sadly, it’s the way out culture is today. Most don’t think twice about using some words and they are very destructive to a Christian’s thought life. This is just one area in which the world tries to penetrate our minds and souls. There are so many other things out there that can ruin our walk with Jesus Christ. Keeping a watch over our thoughts and words is a mere beginning of keeping our lives pure and clean before God.

21st Birthdayeve

Every year on the night before my birthday I reminisce over the past year, the highs and lows, the laughter the tears, the pain and the joy, the good and the bad. Each year I want to say is in it's own way is worse than any other previous year, however, I now realize that each year has it's own unique set of trials and triumphs. With each opportunity I'm given I am also given a choice of how I am going to react to it. Am I going to get mad and angry or am I going to allow it to stretch and grow me?

The first three months of my twenty-first year were full of excitement, I started my junior year of college at Shawnee Baptist, I went to Tennessee with my best friend, I was promoted to a management position at LEE's and overall life was good. Did I mention that we had a lice scare in my dorm? That was pretty exciting. I was getting good grades, having the time of my life, and pretty much didn't really seem to be taking much of anything seriously.

Christmas break of 2012 changed my life drastically. I had planned to stay at school for most of the break so I could work. I took a couple of days off before and the day after Christmas because Mom was supposed to have a hysterectomy. I should have known things were going to be bad from about 5 miles down the road on my way home...yep, I was pulled over with my first official speeding ticket (no comments mom, dad or Jason :P). I arrived at the hospital about an hour before mom went in to the OR. We talked for a few minutes and prayed and then we waited. And waited. And waited. When the surgeon finally came out he told us that things had been a little messier than originally planned but Mom should be fine. To make a very long story short, Mom ended up not being fine. She was supposed to be in the hospital only a couple of days, but ended up being in for 10 due to some major complications. I quit my job and school and moved back home to help out. That took up the last half of December, all of January and into February.

February my dad had surgery on his knee. He also ended up with complications which landed us in the ER at the same time a lifelong friend was having a fatal heart attack just a few doors down from where we were! It was the beginning of a lesson that I'm not sure I've totally learned yet: You don't know when it will be your time to go...so make sure you are making your life count for something. Don't just sit idly by, get up and make a difference.

March brought about more loss and more wake up calls to live life to the fullest. Time after time it seemed that problems were thrown in my path and I had the choice of allowing them to pull me down or learning from them and growing. Learning that no matter what, God is in control and who am I to question His sovereignty?

April was perhaps where I was tested the most. On the 19th we were informed that my dear cousin Greg was missing with a friend in the Grand Tetons of Wyoming. Many of you probably remember reading everything that I posted about the search for them. It was horrific and terrifying and most of all, gut wrentchingly sad. Quite easily the longest week I can remember. The search seemed to be going on and on and on with no hints whatsoever of the whereabouts of Greg and Walker. It was a week of tears and prayers. Begging God to bring them back to us. But alas! it was not God's plan for on Easter Sunday the bodies of the two men were found buried beneath an avalanche. It was a freak of nature, something that should never have happened, but it did. Only God knows why.

May is when things started really looking up. I started getting involved in the Richard Mourdock for US Senate campaign and enjoy it very much. From Lincoln Day Dinners to parades, fair booths to Tea Party meetings I've learned a lot and have enjoyed myself very much.

If there was one lesson that I've learned more than any other this year I would say that it is that God is God and I am not. He is the One in control and He leads us each step of the way. When I rest in Him I fear no evil, but when I take things into my own hands I mess it up. Trusting Jesus, that is all. The other big lesson is to not let life pass me by. Don't be afraid to dream, dare to explore, make each second count.

Don't Take it for Granted

I am sure that by now most of you have heard of the tragic deaths resulting from the collapse of the stage for the Sugarland concert at the Indiana State Fair. Perhaps you have seen the video, or read the articles, or seen the pictures of the aftermath of that sudden, awful twist of nature. For those in it's path there was no advance warning, no time to do anything but watch their lives drastically change, and for some it was the end.

As I watched and re-watched, and re-watched the footage of the collapse there was but one thought that ran through my head, "That could have been anyone, including me." Those people didn't have time to go back and make their wrongs right, or to say "good-bye" to their loved ones. There was no opportunity for them to get things settled with God, that was their time, their last breath, their final call.

Often I find that it is easy for me to take life for granted. I just blow through it without a care or thought, not worrying about the consequences that it will have on my life or on others. I leave things undone or unkind words and actions left unforgiven. It is very easy to forget that eternity is only a heartbeat away. In the matter of a second I could be on the other side of life and never have the chance to forgive, ask forgiveness, finish what I started, or simply say, "I love you." We never know when our number will be called, make sure that your account is settled in Heaven. God desires for all to become His children, He wants us to have a home with Him when it is our time, but the only way for that to happen is for each one of us to personally admit our sins, realize we are in need of Savior, and to accept God's Son, Jesus into our hearts and ask Him to wash away our sins. Only then will any of us truly be prepared for eternity.

Even the Trials

"Have you thanked God for the life He's given you? Even the trials?"

~A Friend~

From friends and family to work and beyond life has been one twist after another lately. Things have been confusing, irritating, flat out wrong, full of people who are indecisive and careless. As a result my soul has been cast down and my spirit has been lacking the joy that is usually there. I've been troubled about many things and instead of relying on Christ as my Rock I found myself focusing instead on my circumstances and worrying about what I was going to do about them.

Last night I was texting a friend about something we were supposed to do today. I was not very optimistic about the outcome and finally told him, "I'm just tired of my life in general and this is yet another problem at the moment." To which he responded with the quote above, "Have you thanked God for the life He's given you? Even the trials?" It was as if God were saying, "Hey girl, quit your whining and complaining, I'm getting tired of it! You need to focus on Me instead of you, and you need to find that there are things in life to be thankful for, even in the worst of times." I felt as though I were a three year old and had been caught getting into something I shouldn't have and been thoroughly spanked. I'd been so busy focusing on circumstances rather than on God. All the problems that I was having were only made worse by the attitude I'd had towards them.

This morning I went to the book of James and read, "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials. Knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." (James 1:2-4) Patience, what an awful word. According to the Merriam-Webster's dictionary patience is "the ability to remain calm and not become annoyed when dealing with problems or with difficult people." So that was pretty much a second spanking. Obviously I failed miserably in this area over and over again. However, there is hope to the passage in James, the very next verse says, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given him." (James 1:5) Also according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary the word wisdom is defined as, "good sense." So putting that word into the verse it would read something like this: "If any of you lacks good sense, let him ask of God..." So here I am, realizing that I'm handling all of these situations completely wrong, and I have no idea how to handle them. Yet the Bible clearly states that trials bring about patience, but if we don't know how to bear the trials all we have to do is ask God and He will give us the knowledge we need to deal with them.

God doesn't want His children focused on their circumstances. He wants them to focus on Him. Praise Him. Thank Him. Live for Him. He desires for us to be so dependent on Him that we automatically hand over our struggles to Him. He alone has the answers, nothing is up to us. Only when we thank God for the life He has given us can we then appreciate all that He has done for us. This is a lesson I am sure I will be learning over and over again, but God is gracious and long-suffering and He will always welcome us back to fellowship with Him.

Struggles

This year has been one of many ups and downs. Frankly, from a human perspective it has been one of the worst years of my life. Things simply have not gone well at all. The beginning of the year outwardly was the hardest with so many things happening to my family that it appears terrible. And it was in one sense, however, when it comes to Spirituality, it was the closest, most sweet time I have ever had with my Lord. I was at a point in life that I had to fully rely on God to get me through each day. I drew close to Him as I spent much time in His Word and on my knees in prayer. Every new day brought more pain and anguish, and each day I learned more and more how much I needed my Savior by my side. It was a time of sweet fellowship with God, and great learning of God. I learned to have sweet peace even in the midst of great adversity. I felt the peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7) and I felt a true sense of joy that went through my entire being.

Recently, on the outside life has calmed down. It has been quite some time since an "emergency" has struck my life. It would seem like right now I would be using this time to discover more about the greatness of God. I hate to admit it, but this time right now I find it more difficult to focus on God than I have in a very long time. Now, instead of outward, visible struggles, I have deep, inward struggles. Although not evident, these seem to be worse than the outward hard times. Rather than depending on God, and trusting Him to see me through, I catch myself trying to work everything out on my own. Doing this causes me to lose focus on the important things of life, and instead concentrate on the parts of life that I have no control over. Rather than spending time reveling in the goodness of God, I find myself fighting Him over minute details that really don't matter in the end. I keep forgetting that God has plans for my life, and those plans are meant for good, not evil, plans of hope for the future. (Jeremiah 29:11).

I would greatly appreciate prayers as I try to refocus my life by truly depending on God and trusting Him for all of my needs.

Trust God

God didn't plan for us to have our lives planned out;

He planned for us to trust Him to plan our lives.

Trust

There is one thing that I struggle with more than anything else in life; that is trusting God for everything. I keep finding myself worrying about the typical things people my age struggle with: things like finishing college, paying my bills (I think everyone struggles with that), what am I going to do after college, finding the one whom I will love for the rest of my life, am I really in the middle of God's will, and so many more. It is so easy to get side tracked from God and onto my circumstances and worries.

A few days ago a friend message me on facebook asking that I pray God would show her what college she is to attend. She is a senior in high school and can't figure out where she is to go (she is a very smart, talented girl and has been accepted to several highly scholastic colleges). She messaged me because according to her I'm a strong Christian. If only she really knew that on the outside I may seem to have everything together, but on the inside I'm just as confused as she is, and I'm not nearly as strong of a Christian as she thinks I am. My answer to her was that I would pray and trust that God would lead her, because God always leads His own. I also gave her some advice that someone gave me not very long ago: "pray that God will close all of the doors that you aren't supposed to go through." I told her to read Jeremiah 29:11 and Proverbs 3:5-6.

As I was responding to this girl I realized how much I needed to heed my own advice. I so often get worried about what the next step is that I should take rather than simply trusting God. This is something that I have written on quite a bit, but it is so true, and a huge struggle for me. Trusting God isn't mearly a decision that is made once, rather it is something I have to decide every day, hour, and minute. I have to chose whether I am going to try to figure things out or if I am going to leave it all in God's hands. I often fall short and try to work my problems out, this only leaves me feeling very confused, angry, and troubled.

God wants each of us to throw everything on Him, allowing Him to be our Captain. When we do this our lives aren't necessarily easy, but the emotional pressure is not nearly as big as it would be otherwise. A very common, and wonderful verse is I Peter 5:7, I found a not so common translation that I think says it the best, "Throw the whole of your anxiety on Him [Jesus], because He Himself cares for you." ~Weymouth New Testament. Throwing everything on Christ means holding nothing back to yourself. It means letting go of all of my plans and desires, and allowing the One Who loves me more than anyone ever will guide me. It means surrender, humility and submission. It means losing control.

Decision Making

When it comes to making big and exstremely important decisions, it seems that most people my age are making the most important decisions of their lives. We're figuring out where to go to college, what to major in, what to do after college, which grad school to go to, who to marry, where to live, and on the list could go. We live life in a pretty confused and often topsy-turvy way. One day we're going here doing this thing, and the next well, we've done a complete 180-degree turn and we're doing something completely different. Our lives are on a constant roller coaster ride of emotions and uncertainty. We are in a process of discovering who we are and what our purpose is.

I happen to be at a crossroads of decision. One way would be a lot easier and honestly makes more sense. The other choice is much more difficult and humanly speaking doesn't make nearly as much sense. I'm torn between the two because neither is a bad decision. Unfortunately this is not a decision that I can take several months to make, in fact I must make it in the next two to three weeks max. My plans for the next few weeks are to do a lot of praying, reading my Bible, and getting counsel from people I trust about what to do. I know that God will lead me the way that is best.

"Receive [wisdom's] instruction, and not silver,

And knowldege rather than choice gold.

For wisdom is better than rubies,

And all the things that one may desire cannot be compared with her.

~Proverbs 8:10-11~

Not in My Time

"Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass."

~Psalm 37:4-5~

I have read these verses often, thinking that it meant if I trusted God everything that I wanted will happen right away. Makes sense, right? Wrong. The other day I read this entire passage and found something interesting a few verses down.

"Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass."

~Psalm 37:7~

Whoa, whoa, whoa!! Rest in the Lord and WAIT PATIENTLY?! I think something is wrong with that wording, certainly God doesn't expect that from me! But nope, that's right....I'm supposed to delight in God, trust in Him and commit my way to Him right NOW (present tense) and then wait for His right timing (future tense). That's pretty tough and involves constant surrender; two extremely difficult things to do.

I have many things that I want, and often we think what we want is the desire of our heart. That is not necessarily true. Sometimes we want lots of things that aren't good for us, and God knows that we are frail, fallible creatures and in His wisdom He brings along the true desires of our hearts. For illustrations sake, this can easily be related to a parent/child relationship. When I was younger I wanted lots of things that weren't good for me. I wanted candy all the time, but my parents knew that wasn't good for me, so they didn't give it to me. Was I always happy about this? The answer would be a resounding "NO!" But was it the best for me, and really the desire of my heart, yes.

God is not a mean ogre sitting in Heaven taking our plans and wants and throwing them away while He laughs at our misery. Quite the contrary, God can see the big picture of our lives. Out of love He takes and gives things to His children. We may not understand, but He never asked us to understand, only to trust that what He is doing is the best for us and the real desire of our hearts.

Contemplating God

Have you ever sat down and contemplated God? I mean really think about Him? He has so many aspects. He is all powerful, all knowing, loving, caring, compassionate, righteous, true, pure, holy, omnipresent, just, glorious, patient, wonderful and on the list could go. In my mind it is easy to think of Him as a creature that is so big, but distant. The best I can relate that feeling to is the President. He's powerful, a leader, and there isn't much of a chance that I will ever get to meet him, let alone have a personal, one-on-one relationship with him. God is not that way. God may be big, but He longs to know each one of His children on a personal level.

God is not some creature up in Heaven sitting back and watching the happenings in the world, unconcerned, and unattached. Rather, He is right here on earth in spirit with His children. He longs for a close, personal relationship with us. I fear that often we go through life forgetting that He is there and totally blowing Him off. But patiently He waits, softly calling our name until we realize that He is there and how wonderful being with Him can be. When we embark on an intimate relationship with God He blows us away with how He treats us.

"God loves each one of us as if there were only one of us." ~St. Augustine Just think about that, God has many children, but yet He takes time for me and treats me as if I am His only child. The hymn "In the Garden" says is well, "And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own. And the joy we share as we tarry there, none other can ever know." Sadly, I think we often pass up that precious relationship because we have other things on our mind. Out of a sheer lack of appreciation God is pushed off and we forfeit a sweet, close relationship with Him.

"Because he has set his love upon Me [God], therefore I will deliver him; I will set him on high, because he has known My name." ~Psalm 91:14

Consume Me

"God, I pray Thee, light these idle sticks of my life and may I burn for Thee. Consume my life, my God, for it is Thine. I seek not a long life, but a full one, like You, Lord Jesus."

~Jim Elliot~

Jim Elliot wrote this one summer while he was in college, which means he was right around my age. He had an evident dedication to God, and he wanted to display that in any way possible -- even to the point of death. He ended up being a missionary in Ecuador, and was martyred by the Auca Indians. As a result of his death the door was opened to these people for the Gospel. Now there is a thriving church among this once feared tribe of cannibals.

This made me seriously consider my life. I have come to the conclusion that I want God to run my life, I want to be filled by Him, I long to have a life that benefits and brings glory to Him alone. Whether I have one year or 60 years left in my life I want them to be filled with helping people and doing what God wants. I desire my life to be a living sacrifice to my Savior. When it is time for me to stand before my Maker, I hope to hear the words, "Well done!" I don't want to look back with regret at missed opportunities, wasted minutes, and empty enterprises. I want to look back at a full life -- full of things done to bring people closer to Jesus. I want my life to be a blazing "stick" for Christ, not a smoldering pile of ash that never amounted to anything.

Happiness Is:

The other day I was listening to the radio while driving home from work. They played "Happiness is the Lord" which I have not sung or heard since I was growing up.

Happiness is to know the Savior,

Living a life within His favor,

Having a change in my behavior,

Happiness is the Lord.

Happiness is a new creation,

Jesus and me in close relation,

Having a part in His Salvation,

Happiness is the Lord.

Real joy is mine,

No matter if the teardrops start,

I've found a secret,

It's Jesus in my heart.

Happiness is to be forgiven,

Living a life that's worth the livin'

Taking the road that leads to Heaven,

Happiness is the Lord.

Real joy is mine,

No matter if the teardrops start,

I've found the secret,

It's Jesus in my heart.

I love being a Christian. I love knowing where I'm going when I die. I love having a life that I know is worth living. I love having a close relationship with Christ. I love having that joy, even when life is not hard, and I cry, there is still a joy deep down that brings me hope. Some may find their happiness in their job, or in their friends and family, or in the stuff that they have. Those things are all well and good, but true joy and lasting happiness come from God Above, who blesses His children with the promise of life everlasting. Like Mary the mother of Jesus said, "My soul doth magnify the Lord; and my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Savior..." (Luke 1:46)

Jesus Paid it All

Last night my church had a communion service. I was asked to play my cello during this solemn remembrence of our Lord's death and resurrection. One of the hymns I played was "Jesus Paid it All," by Elvina M. Hall. Before I played I read over the words several times and they spoke to me in many ways.

I hear the Savior say,

"Thy strength indeed is small;

Child of weakness watch and pray,

Find in Me thy all in all."

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

For nothing good have I

Whereby Thy grace to claim;

I'll wash my garments white

In the blood of Cal'vry's Lamb.

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

And now complete in Him,

My robe, His righteousness,

Close sheltered 'neath His side,

I am divinely blessed.

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

Lord, now indeed I find

Thy power and Thine alone,

Can change the leper's spots

And melt a heart of stone.

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

When from my dying bed

My ransomed soul shall rise,

"Jesus died my soul to save,"

Shall rend the vaulted skies.

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

And when before the throne

I stand in Him complete,

I'll lay my trophies down,

All down at Jesus' feet.

Jesus paid it all,

All to Him I owe;

Sin had left a crimson stain,

He washed it white as snow.

What a wonderful Savior I have to have come to this earth to pay a price for me -- a price so high that it required Him to die on a cruel cross. The most amazing thing to me is that Jesus loved me so much that He not only went, but He went willingly. I truly have nothing good to give in order to claim His grace, but that is the most wonderful of all, He did it for me for free. He paid it all, who am I to not willingly give Him my life, my love, my all?

The Next Day

The past few days I have seriously been thinking about how quickly life changes. With the sudden death of Mrs. Williams life has taken on a whole new meaning. I keep thinking of Proverbs 27:1

"Boast not thyself of tomorrow; for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth."

Friday afternoon she was babysitting some of her grandkids. I am sure that she was planning what she would fix for dinner, what time she was going to put the baby to bed, what she was going to be doing the next morning, and so on but none of that happened. Instead she ended up in the emergency room, flying to a bigger hospital, having surgery, and ultimately going Home to be with her Lord.

For some unknown reason to us, God chose to take His servant to Heaven with Him Saturday morning. He chose to take her suddenly, without giving any of us a chance to knowingly say our good-byes. I honestly don't remember the last time I spoke to her, but I do know it was in the past two weeks. I don't remember what our conversation was about, or how long it was. I do know that I did not have a clue that I would never speak to her again.

I have learned that taking life for granted is really a sin. We don't know what will happen to us, in a minute, an hour, a day or a year. Make sure that you leave no hard feelings, no sadness, and no wrongs that have not been made right. Most of all, make sure that you have trusted Christ as your personal Savior, and that you have a short account with God.

None of us knows when it is our time to die. For some, it may be a prolonged illness, where we know that our days are short. Although some major suffering may be included, at least those have a chance to say good-bye to their loved ones. However, others may go in an instant with no extra chances. Only God knows, He it is Who knows our moment of death.

"Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make profit'; whereas ye do not know what will happen tomorrow.

For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.

Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.'"

~James 4:13-15~

I Know Who Holds Tomorrow

Yesterday I went to a concert at a church here in town. There were many pieces played and sung by artists that go to that church, but one song that was sung had a special meaning to me:

I Know Who Holds Tomorrow

I don't know about tomorrow,

I just live from day to day,

And I don't borrow from its sunshine

'Cause the skies might turn to grey.

And I don't worry about the future,

'Cause I know what Jesus said,

And today I'm gonna walk right beside Him

'Cause He's the one Who knows what is ahead.

There are things about tomorrow

I don't seem to understand,

But I know Who holds tomorrow

And I know Who holds my hand.

And each step is getting brighter

As the golden stairs I climb,

And every burden is getting lighter,

And all the clouds are silver lined.

And over there the sun is always shining

And no tears will dim the eye

At the ending of the rainbow

Where the mountains, they touch the sky.

There are many things about tomorrow

I don't seem to understand,

But I know Who holds tomorrow

And I know Who holds my hand.

~LeAnn Rimes

I used to have to have my life planned out exactly how it was going to be. I could not stand the thought of not know what tomorrow and the day after, and the month after and my entire life held. Several times I have had those perfectly laid plans completely demolished by God. Lately, I have simply left it up to Him. Yes, I have a general idea of some things in life, but many I don't have a clue about, and that is perfectly fine with me. I'm tired of trying to plan things on my own instead of just letting go and allowing God to take control and do as He pleases. May the Lord be glorified in my life both now and forevermore.

Full Blast

I came across an interesting passage today in Acts 20. In this passage the apostle Paul is talking to the leaders in the church at Ephesus. He makes a very interesting statement:

"And see, now I go bound in the spirit to Jerusalem, not knowing the things that will happen to me there, except that the Holy Spirit testifies in every city, saying that chains and tribulations await me." (Acts 20:22-23)

Most would say that Paul is insane for going ahead with this plan of travelling to Jerusalem. After all, who in their right mind would willingly go somewhere that they are guaranteed problems? Surely Paul is going to back out and stay where it is safe! But wait, Paul is not finished, he continues in verse 24:

"But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God."

When I first read that I was amazed at Paul's endurance, faithfulness, boldness, and steadfastness. He was not willing to allow persecution to stop him from taking the message of God's amazing grace to the lost. He did not consider safety of his physical body to be more important than the salvation of lost souls who were on their way to hell. He knew his life was short and he wanted to finish strong for God, not wavering or wimping out. Unreservedly he gave his all to the One who had given His all on Calvary.

Sadly, I am afraid that out of a simple fear of people we fail to remember that we have been called to a ministry of telling others about Christ's gracious and free gift. Often the thought of going to someone we do not know (and especially those we do know) terrifies us. We are afraid of what they will think, or how they will react. We want to be on their good side, and we definitely do NOT want them to think we are some sort of religious freak.

But Paul, KNEW he was going to be persecuted much more than we will ever be in America, and still he went, counting his life as nothing in comparison to the spiritual darkness of the lives of those to whom he was to minister. How much better it would be if we would truly count the cost of serving Christ, taking out the stops, and going full blast for Him.