Life.......

I just realized that I haven't updated anyone with the recent happenings of my life. Well, there really haven't been *that* many recent happening for me to report about. Between working at Lake City Bank and Wendy's I've been working over 50 hours a week!!! Generally working from 7 or 7:30 am until 10 or 11 pm!!! My life pretty much consists of work, taking a quick 45 minute or so nap, going back to work coming home going to sleep, and starting all over again! It's been fun...I guess! :P Then entire month of July I think I had 4 days off!! :-O Because on top of those 2 jobs I'm also playing the piano for Warsaw Bible Church, so I have to practice for that too, and then of course play on Sundays. I'm actually loving that part of my life...I've really enjoyed getting to know my new church family and it's been great being able to minister to them in that way.

Samuel turned 16 a week ago! It's hard to believe that my lil bro is getting so old! :P He got his drivers permit...scary! We went to Wright-Patterson Air Force Base in Dayton, OH to go to the big flight museum there. It was fun...although I was slightly disappointed that there weren't more guys in uniform around! :P

I actually took a day off yesterday and hung out with some friends from International that live about 1 1/2 hours away. We laugh about how we are all from Indiana but had to go to New York to meet! It was great catching up with them, and just hanging out and having a day to sort of relax! :) I meant to get some pictures, but I forgot! :( Oh well, we're hoping to get together again sometime, so when that happens I'll be sure to get pics.

I haven't been feeling very well again so I went to the doctor. On top of having kidney stones (don't ask me how I managed to get those) and after having several tests done the diagnosis is that my stomach doesn't empty the way it should (I forget the actual medical term for it). The doc said that he could put me on a pill that would cause a lot of side effects, but he doesn't want to do that to a 19 year old (a fact of which I'm very grateful). Surgery was another option, but doc said that once again he doesn't want to do that to someone my age, and there isn't a very good likely hood that it would work. The only other option he said was to eat mainly in the morning and to run or walk briskly for 45 minutes after each meal. So let me just say, if you've never exercised immediately after a meal it's not a pleasant feeling at all. But hopefully it will help!!

Saturday we are heading north for a week! We're dropping Samuel off in Oshkosh, WI for flight camp and my parents and I are going to Minnesota for vacation! I'm looking forward to the sleep! :) :) I think the only real plans we have are to go about 3 or 4 hours north with a bunch of my aunts and uncles to spend the night at some tourist town. I'm not too sure what that's all about, all I know is I'm along for the ride! :D I will post pictures after the trip!

I think the last major thing on the docket at the moment is school. I'm heading back for my last year of classes (I'll still have a semester of student teaching next Fall). I'm kinda excited, but at the same time kinda dreading school. I can't wait til this year is over though! There's an end in sight, and that's thrilling!! :) Please pray that I can find a job. I've filled out several applications online and I've had one lady call me back already!!

In an Instant

Sometimes it's so easy to take for granted that fact that I'm young. I quite often forget that no matter the age, anything can happen and totally devastate life as I know it. This is true for a friend of mine, her sister, and her sister's fiancée. The other day my friend's future brother-in-law was in a horrific motorcycle accident that left him paralyzed from mid-chest down! Here he was, a young guy, getting ready for his wedding next month, and suddenly life has dramatically changed for him. I also was just reading a book about a girl who was killed in a car accident the summer between her Senior year of high school and her Freshman year of college. This was a young 18 year old woman, full of plans and dreams but in an instant her life was snuffed out.

To me, those were two HUGE reminders to live every day as if it could be my last...because as the saying goes, someday it will be my last day. You never know when you're time is up and God will call you home. Keep a short account with Him and with others. Don't let the sun go down on your wrath.

Most of all, make each day count, and live it to it's fullest. Spend lots of time laughing and loving! Don't be afraid of today, but rather, embrace it! Keep dreaming, but in the midst of planning for the future, don't forget that you're living in today. You have no guarantees of tomorrow, only of today.

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count.

It's the life in your years."

~Abraham Lincoln

Walk on the Water

You look around

It's staring back at you

Another wave of doubt

Will it pull you under

You wonder

What if I'm overtaken

What if I never make it

What if no one's there?

Will you hear my prayer?

When you take that first step

Into the unknown

You know that he won't let you go

Chorus:

So what are you waiting for?

What do you have to lose?

Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more

So don't be afraid to move

Your faith is all

It takes and you can

Walk on the water too

Verse 2:

So get out

And let

Your fear fall to the ground

No time to waste

Don't wait

Don't you turn around and miss out

Everything you were made for

I know you're not sure

So you play it safe

Try to run away

If you take that first step

Into the unknown

He won't let you go

(chorus)

Bridge:

(step out)

Even when a storm hits

(step out)

Even when you're broken

(step out)

Even when your heart is telling you telling you to give up

(step out)

When your hope is stolen

(step out)

You can't see where you're going

You don't have to be afraid

So what are you waiting,

What are you waiting for?

So what are you waiting for?

What do you have to lose?

Your insecurities try to hold to you

You know you're made for more

So don't be afraid to move

Your faith is all

It takes and you can

Walk on the water...

Walk on the water too

~Britt Nicole

He DOES!!!!!

"Delight thyself also in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires

of thine heart." ~Psalm 37:4

I posted not too long ago about how trusting God to take care of my future is hard. It' just a matter of letting go and letting God. Well, I decided to put that into practice. I decided that I was just going to let go and give everything to Him. Since then I've been a lot happier and content with my life. Life has been really good for some of my friends and family, and I've been so thrilled for them that I can hardly contain myself. I quickly discovered that in order to be happy life doesn't have to be going perfect...it's what you make of what God has given you. Joy is a choice that you have to make day in and day out, and often several times a day.

While I was busy just taking everything day by day and not worrying too much about what's next (although I must admit I've had my moments), God was (and still is) busy working on my future...and fulfilling one of my dreams...one I hadn't given much thought to lately simply because I didn't think it was possible anymore. This morning I paid my registration for next school year. Tonight after I got off work I had a text message from the Dean of Women asking me to pray about being a prayer leader (same thing as a room leader)!! After I read that I was debating whether or not I should laugh or cry...this is a dream come true for me, and one that I no longer was demanding from God! Isn't He wonderful! He has so many blessing in store for each one of us if only we'll give Him everything we have!

I'll be honest, I was kinda dreading going back to college. I wasn't sure yet if I could handle more. However, in the past couple of days God has put a few subtle things in my life as if He was nudging me saying, "Hey, it's all right to go back...you started, now finish what I planned for you!" This last little, or rather huge, nudge was just the push I needed! I'm now officially excited about the school year! It can't come soon enough!

Ray

I've written in the past about my friend, Ray, who is in the Army. I've asked prayer for his Salvation, and for his protection as he's been in Iraq once and Afghanistan twice. Well, he was home for 2 weeks of leave and I got to see him several times, so I thought I'd post a picture that way you can put a face to his name. Please continue praying for his Salvation...he's still not very open to Christianity at all. He's getting ready to be transferred to a unit in Alaska, and will probably be going back to Afghanistan by the end of the year! I'll keep everyone posted.

*************

Be Still, My Soul

The other night my cousin, Megan, and I went to a praise and worship service. One of the songs we sang is a hymn that used to be one of my favorites...I haven't sung it in ages, and then while singing it tonight I remembered why I loved it so much. I actually broke down crying in the middle of it, so I thought I'd share...(I switched the order of some of the verses to the way I would sing them if it were up to me).

Be Still, My Soul

Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.

Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.

Leave to thy God to order and provide;

In every change, He faithful will remain.

Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend

Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,

And all is darkened in the vale of tears,

Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,

Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.

Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay

From His own fullness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake

To guide the future, as He has the past.

Thy hope, they confidence let nothing shake;

All now mysterious shall be bright at last.

Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know

His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on

When we shall be forever with the Lord.

When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,

Sorrow forgot, loves purest joys restored.

Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past

All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.

Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise

On earth, be leaving, to Thy Lord on high;

Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,

So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.

Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine

Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.

~Katherina von Schlegel

Often in the rush of life I forget to be still and listen to God. I find myself trying to fix my own problems and figuring out my life my way. It is only when I quite my soul and turn to God that I realize He is on my side and He can fight my battles for me so much better than I ever could on my own, and He alone is faithful through everything.

The second verse I had never heard before, but as we sang it, I broke down crying. I think the hardest thing ever is to lose a good and dear friend. Whether it be through death, over a specific issue or two, or just a gradual drifting apart, it's never easy and tears are a natural part of grieving. However, I know from personal experience, that when I watch a friend leave God proves to me every time that He is there to comfort me. In fact, John 14:18 says it best, "I [Jesus] will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." I guess the biggest part of the song to me is the last phrase, "Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay from His own fullness he can repay." His repayment is so much more than I ever deserved, and I've found it to be beyond my wildest imaginations. One of my friends recently put it to me this way: "Life is like a puzzle, we only see the mixed up pieces, but God has the box and He alone knows how everything is going to turn into a beautiful picture."

"Be still and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah." -Psalm 46:10-11

Each Step

Have you ever come to a point in your life when you have *no* idea whatsoever what you’re going to do next, you don’t even know what you want to do in life, and pretty much life seems to have no direction? Maybe it seems as if all of your carefully laid plans no longer are going to work out, and you wonder “What is the point of even trying?” Life just seems to be a humongous black hole of uncertainty and doubt. To be blatantly honest, that’s how I feel at the moment…I’m no longer certain of anything in my life. However, I’ve decided that rather than sitting back and wondering what the big plan for my life is, to instead take life day by day, trusting God to lead me in each step that I take. “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity” (Jeremiah 29:11-14, NIV). God has a plan for each one of us, but the only way the “big” plan can take place is if we follow in His “little” daily plans. “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.” (Matthew 6:34 KJV)

Personally, it’s *very* hard for me to trust God with my future. I like to have everything planned out in advance, and when I have to give it over to Him I tend to do it with a *LOT* of reluctance. I have to remember that God had a plan for me before I was even born and He has bigger things in store for me. “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.” (Jeremiah 1:5 NKJV)

One of my favorite passages in Scripture is Isaiah 55:8-9 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Every time life doesn’t go “my way” (which is quite often) I have to remind myself that God’s way is higher than mine. He alone sees the big picture and He guides and directs my accordingly. I cannot questions Him; all I can do is sweetly submit to whatever He chooses to bring into my life. I must wait upon my Lord, and He will lead me in the way I should go.